Mama Kat’s Workshop: Ode to my Bra

Mama Kat is at it again! And here’s where I get all eloquent about clothes.

4.) Write a 20-line poem (rhyming or non-rhyming) dedicated to your favorite piece of clothing (could be a shirt, hat, shoes, etc.). (inspired by writersdigest.com)

***


Look me in my eyes.

Really. Look me in my eyes because to look down?

Is to look at Falsehood.

Long ago and far away, I was honest.

I stood straight and thrust my chest out proudly

“Small but mighty!” I intoned.

“All natural, all mine!”

I was Small-Chested Woman, and Perky, to boot.

But today…ah, Time! Cruel, cruel Time.

And cruel, cruel Gravity.

The twin enemies of the twin Girls.

Instead of pride, I now flaunt gel.

My bra is squishy with “extra support”.

My boobs are mine, because I bought them.

At Target. In the lingerie aisle.

Is there any greater gift than the push-up bra?

My clothes look better, thanks to bra technology.

My shape more balanced.

And the ravages of time and age and motherhood are disguised.

And thus, I have one in every color.

Mama's Losin' It

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20 comments for “Mama Kat’s Workshop: Ode to my Bra

  1. Amy
    May 13, 2010 at 7:34 am

    very fun and i truly laughed out loud.

  2. May 13, 2010 at 8:09 am

    This was clever , I did not want to pick that prompt because I have nothing to write about my clothes, but his could be me writing, as I was flat and perky and now well now gravity…..

  3. Jen
    May 13, 2010 at 8:20 am

    this was great and I too have major issues with gravity.

  4. May 13, 2010 at 8:31 am

    Visiting from Mama Kats…

    Love this! At least buying them at Target is more affordable than buying them from a plastic surgeon! And I have the opposite problem … I have ones that are way too big and I’m always looking for a bra that will squash and minimize!

  5. May 13, 2010 at 9:36 am

    Sadly when your bajongas are as big as mine push bras are useless as the heavy bowling balls that were once the main attraction at night spots around my college town are so heavy that they rebelliously drop beneath the push-up mechanism. It’s a scary sight when one goes to change clothing only to find that you are feeling light headed b/c your bra is cutting off your circulation and your nips are turning blue as they dangle beneath the bra cups. I can only look back in shame on the good ole days and try not to step on the nasties when I walk. Enjoy your push-up bras and relish the fact that the big boobie girls are envious of you in our older age!

  6. thenextmartha
    May 13, 2010 at 9:38 am

    I used to have to use the chicken cutlets before I had children. Then with each child they grew 1/2 cup size. The right one got a bit more aggressive so it grew a bit more. At this point I no longer am wearing things to add depth to them, I’m just trying to keep them in an approximate location.

  7. KLZ
    May 13, 2010 at 9:40 am

    I have been looking forward to this all morning and was not disappointed.

  8. May 13, 2010 at 9:44 am

    VERY funny! I love this. I have the opposite problem as wel, but none-the-less, still a problem. LOL

  9. May 13, 2010 at 9:46 am

    Possibly the best poem I’ve ever read.

  10. May 13, 2010 at 9:50 am

    Bravo!!

  11. May 13, 2010 at 10:05 am

    LOL! Love it! I wish there were a push up bra for large chested women. Because the extra gel? Makes me look like I’m manning torpedos.

    Your poem rocks.

  12. anthrogrrl
    May 13, 2010 at 10:16 am

    Remember that song from the 90s, “Wonderwall,” that had no intelligible lyrics? We used to sing along “you are my Wonderbra,” and a friend developed an intricate analysis of the Wonderba as metaphor for the kind of support a girlfriend should give her boyfriend. But I like your poem a lot better. *smile*

  13. JS
    May 13, 2010 at 11:08 am

    I’m so glad mine are still perky. Does this mean I’ll have to start wearing bras in my old age? 😉

  14. May 13, 2010 at 11:39 am

    Oh this is hilarious. I’m still on the perky side of the itty bitty titty committee so it’s nice to have a heads up as to what I have to look forward to. Not gonna lie, I still have yet to get used to wearing “big girl” bras. Thankfully I have a few years to get used to the idea.

  15. May 13, 2010 at 11:45 am

    I’m with you sista! I proudly put my “boobs” on every morning. Gotta love those gel bras.

  16. May 13, 2010 at 12:42 pm

    Ah yes, the bra! Love my bra, although I am in dire need of a new one :O) Although, 15 yrs ago I was tiny and perky, today, after gaining weight (and losing it all), they have delighted me with plentiness (2 sizes bigger) but now, gravity has a bigger effect than it would have been 15 yrs ago..lol!

  17. May 13, 2010 at 2:39 pm

    Nicely done! My girls let me down a long time ago ~sigh~

  18. Lo
    May 14, 2010 at 8:45 am

    That is so funny! I started writing on this prompt with the exact same title!! Love it!

  19. May 14, 2010 at 10:20 am

    I can’t wait to hang up (or throw out) the nursing bras and give the girls a good boost again!
    Stopping by from Three Pugs and following you now. Happy Friday!

  20. May 14, 2010 at 12:22 pm

    I’m coming over from Jenn’s at 3 pugs, but I did this exact prompt yesterday….for the EXACT same article of clothing!!! LMAO. I’m so glad Jenn introduced me to you. I’m very happily a new fan.

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