Beauty Top Down: My Hair. Again.


It has now been almost 14 weeks since I got my hair chemically straightened with a Brazilian Blowout. Not coincidentally, it’s been 14 weeks since my hair looked good.

For those of you who have not been following along, I have curly hair and a penchant for trying to look better. So back in August I got a Brazilian Blowout in the hopes that it would magically render my frizzy locks into smooth Aniston-like beachy waves.

What I got instead was hair that looked like Dora without the bangs. Flat. Straight. Flat.

The Brazilian Blowout was supposed to leave some body in my hair and leave me the option of styling it curly or straight with much less frizz or fuss than in its natural state. The “no-frizz” promise delivered but everything else was a total bust. I’ve had my straight, dead-looking hair in a ponytail since summer because there was no other option. It resisted all attempts at styling until recently and could not be coaxed into anything resembling body. It was flat, hanging there around my face, making me look older and bedraggled.

At first I thought the flatness would wear off over time and I’d get some curl back once the process started to fade. It’s billed as wearing off slowly and leaving hair to return to its natural state over 10-12 weeks. No such luck. Right now, at 14 weeks, my hair can best be described as slightly bent in spots. It’s barely wavy, not curly in the slightest. I have hopes that by next summer this will have worn off completely but I’m not holding my breath for a recovery much before then.

It’s possible that I have the one head of hair that reacts over-zealously to chemical relaxing but I don’t think that’s it. I think the woman who did this for me over-processed it.  I bought the Blowout through a Living Social deal and I suspect this process is new to the salon and the stylists were not experts in doing it well yet and hadn’t had a chance to find out the long term results of their expertise.  Lesson learned. I’ll never try something new in this manner again. From now on, it’s my regular stylist or no stylist at all.

Not that I’ll be doing a Brazilian Blowout again under any circumstance. Never mind how shitty my hair looks. There have been reports recently that the solution used contains formaldehyde in significant enough quantities to make stylists sick. When I was getting mine done, I wore a surgical mask and, even so, my eyes and throat were burning from the fumes. I may be crazy, but I’m not dumb enough to put embalming fluid on my head again.

I am officially declaring the Brazilian Blowout a big fail. You can try it if you want to, but I’m saying that its a recipe for bad hair achieved through the application of poison to your head, all at the low, low price of about $350. Save the bucks, buy some shoes.

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11 comments for “Beauty Top Down: My Hair. Again.

  1. November 11, 2010 at 8:02 am

    Poor thing. But hey, you’re helping other people avoid the blow out? Maybe?

  2. November 11, 2010 at 8:08 am

    Crap!! I was totally going to do that in the hopes of having Jennifer Aniston hair. Boo.
    Thanks for the info though. Law Momma is right, you’ve saved me a ton of cash and spared my husband the “it looks terrible”whining.
    We both appreciate it.

  3. November 11, 2010 at 9:32 am

    Seriously, you should have taken the $350 and got yourself some Jimmy Choo shoes. 🙂

  4. thenextmartha
    November 11, 2010 at 10:27 am

    This terrifies me. About 9 months ago for some reason my hair broke off in a large clump about 1.5 inches from my scalp. I suspect over processing too. So I’ve been growing out the little clump forever. It no longer sticks up. I can’t even imagine having ALL my hair in that state. I’m so sorry for your loss of possible good hair days you could have had. Oh, and saying that your hair is “slightly bent” made me laugh. But not in a good way.

  5. November 11, 2010 at 11:06 am

    Yeah, so there will be no chemical straightening for my daughter’s curly hair. Ever.

    I will hope for your curly hair return soon!

  6. November 11, 2010 at 11:14 am

    oh man, that sucks.

    Next time, a new handbag.

  7. amy
    November 11, 2010 at 4:15 pm

    Next time try to embrace your curl. It makes life so much easier. Since you live in DC there is a Ouidad salon at Tysons but I prefer the curly girl cut. Us curly girls unite!!

  8. November 11, 2010 at 9:40 pm

    This is one of those times I am thankful that I am the cheapest woman alive! Sorry you are going through this.

  9. November 12, 2010 at 1:24 pm

    I’m in the same boat. Just get yourself a Chi and a bottle of Super Skinny by Paul Mitchell. If I’d been armed with these during high school, I’d have had the BEST Farrah feathers in the whole school.

  10. November 15, 2010 at 11:49 pm

    Picts or it didn’t happen : )

  11. November 17, 2010 at 3:22 am

    Sorry to hear that! In our quest for beauty, it is always good to be caution! At least, now we know that this so called Brazilian Blowout is a letdown after all. Try something else…

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