America’s Next Top Douche

2010 has been a banner year for douche-baggery. Maybe not since Monica Lewinsky failed to do her laundry have we seen such sterling examples of the baser nature of public figures. The worlds of sports, entertainment, and politics were all rife with douching.

There were the New York Jets and their piss poor manners in the locker room. There was Brett Favre and his junk. In fact, Brett Favre’s junk might be a contender all on its own.

There was Spencer Pratt being a douche just by existing, then raising the stakes by staging a fake divorce to improve his career. There was Jesse James cheating on Sandra Bullock with a tattoo model. There was Mel Gibson just being himself.

And let’s not think only men were douching it up this year. Senate candidate Sharron Angle made some waves in the Massengil bottle when she put air quotes around the word autism in a speech. Like it’s imaginary or something. Kate Gosselin persisted in pimping her offspring out to TLC for shoe money. Anyone who signed up to be  Real Housewife is a douche-suspect. And Snooki. Just because.

And we can’t forget the douche of the hour Kody Brown of Sister Wives.

This is just a small sampling of the douches of the past year. My partner in crime stark. raving. mad. mommy. and I are embarking on a quest to find the Top Ten Douches of 2010 and we need your help. Mainly because there were so many douches running amok that we can’t remember them all. So we’d like to to leave comments for us to help us along. Who do you think was a Top Douche of the year? Who resonated Douchitude most deeply with you? Who deserves to wear the Summer’s Eve Douche Crown?

Comments on this post and at SRMM’s blog  will be open until Saturday night. On Sunday we’ll whittle it down to the top twenty and open a week of voting. Then we will unveil our Top Ten Douches of 2010 list, complete with douchtastic profiles of the winners!

So submit your nominees and may the best douche win!

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29 comments for “America’s Next Top Douche

  1. Michele
    November 29, 2010 at 7:54 am

    Jon Gosselin with his douchey Ed Hardy t-shirts.

  2. November 29, 2010 at 8:59 am

    Definitely Kody Brown. Vienna Girardi/Jake Pavelka. Kanye West just because of his existence and recent interview with Matt Lauer. Lindsay Lohan. This will be fun to vote!

  3. November 29, 2010 at 9:12 am

    If Kody Brown isn’t douchenozzle #1, I’ll be sad.

  4. November 29, 2010 at 9:29 am

    Was Tiger Woods this year? He’s so douchey I think he should be at #1 even if his douchiness was in 2009!!!!

  5. November 29, 2010 at 11:19 am

    Wow, this is tough. Kanye West for sure. Also Danielle from Real Housewives of New Jersey. Dina and Michael Lohan are both equally worthy of the douche crown.

  6. amy
    November 29, 2010 at 11:21 am

    I have to say Lebron James and the way he delivered his “I am not coming back to Cleveland” speech.

  7. November 29, 2010 at 11:24 am

    I agree… is it too late to nominate Tiger Woods? I know it all came out last year but it was the end of the year… and I think he’s one of the bigger douchehats I’ve ever had the displeasure to be around.

    But if we must focus solely on 2010, then I nominate Spencer Pratt. Because in a world of douches, he is seriously one of the douchiest.

  8. November 29, 2010 at 11:34 am

    I’m going to go with Tiki Barber for dumping his wife when she was 8-months pregnant with twins.

    I know I’m a little sensitive when it comes to the pregnant ladies, but that is about as considerate as cat shit and deserves a kick in the vittles.

  9. November 29, 2010 at 1:42 pm

    Spencer Pratt, hands down, makes me sick to my stomach. Well, and pat Robertson always makes me weep, but that’s just for existing.

  10. November 29, 2010 at 2:58 pm

    did i breeze through the douches too quickly and miss tiger woods? or is he not on the list?

  11. November 29, 2010 at 2:59 pm

    The entire Republican Party? 🙂

  12. November 29, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    WOW. I missed the Tiki Barber deal. Yeah, that ranks up there with Brett Favre’s junk.

    How about Jay Leno, or really NBC?

  13. November 29, 2010 at 7:35 pm

    I would say Spencer Pratt but he should really be retired from this category by now right? The way Oprah excused herself from Daytime Emmy nominations after her 4,693th win or something? Because DUH, OBVIOUS WINNER FOREVAH.

    But I think my nomination has to go to Kanye. He’s got a couple more years before reaching the Oprah-exception level.

  14. November 29, 2010 at 8:15 pm

    Does Charlie Sheen get the Honorary Life Time Douche Achievement Award? I think it’s time.

  15. November 29, 2010 at 11:22 pm

    I’d say pretty much the entire GOP.

  16. November 29, 2010 at 11:44 pm

    HEEELLLLLOOOOOO? Christine O’Donnell? Yes, let’s run for the US Senate and not even know what is the first amendment of the constitution.

    I think she should at least get an honorary Massengil mention!

  17. Jessica
    November 30, 2010 at 1:11 am

    Definitely that chick who PRETENDED SHE HAS CANCER to rack up “donations”. I can’t remember her name, but considering she defrauded people out of thousands of dollars, used a tragic disease as a way to make money and, well, even for thinking up the scheme, I think that she deserves to be douche bag of the year.

  18. Jessica
    November 30, 2010 at 1:16 am

    Definitely that chick who PRETENDED SHE HAD CANCER to rack up “donations”. Ashley Anne Kirilow defrauded people out of thousands of dollars, and used a tragic disease as a way to make money (DOUCEBAG!) she deserves this award.

  19. Jen
    November 30, 2010 at 2:26 am

    Definitely that chick who pretended she had cancer – Ashley Anne Kirilow! Absolutely Christine O’Donnell – TOTAL DOUCHE!! And while we’re on the subject of teabaggers – one from my homestate: Joe Miller – had a reporter handcuffed in a public meeting for get this, daring to ask questions! Ok Ok, and of course, Sarah Palin. Just because she’s a total douchebag. And always will be.

  20. November 30, 2010 at 11:23 am

    The overall amount of douchebaggery this year has been epic, but I’m thinking its a tie between Spencer Pratt & Charlie Sheen for King Douche. Its like Charlie is Spencer’s mentor or something.

  21. November 30, 2010 at 2:31 pm

    I’d like to nominate my ex husband, but well, not everyone knows him and his epic douchebaggery. Consider yourselves lucky.

  22. thenextmartha
    December 1, 2010 at 10:38 am

    omg. too many. can’t even think. Can I just nominate all the above one additional time? Tiger, Spencer, Charlie and can I throw in that snookie and “the situation” dude? yeah.

  23. Hope C
    December 1, 2010 at 10:45 am

    Ok I have one…Kate and Lydia wrote a blog about her, but the biggest Douche of 2010 in my opinion is that woman from Michigan who tormented the little girl that was dying. I can’t remember her name, but the girls parents I think are dead and grandma is raising her and these people (her nieghbors) were horrible to her.

  24. Erica Snipes
    December 1, 2010 at 11:16 am

    You are right about the epic display of douchebags that have graced our news and entertainment media this year. So, I will add to the nominations here: sister-wives dude, Tiki Barber (WOW…missed that one…he sucks with capital SUCKS!), Charlie Sheen, the entire group of people that terrorized that little dying girl in Michigan, anybody who bullied anybody and especially any of those people that bullied the poor teenagers that have committed suicide this year, Spencer Pratt, the Teabaggers (from Sarah Palin on down), and the woman that faked her daughter’s death holding a funeral and all, just to get sympathy and money. Oy vey. Today is World Aids Day and Pay it Forward Day…a little perspective wouldn’t kill some of us, huh?! There are some crazies out there…

  25. Shelley
    December 2, 2010 at 11:24 am

    I nominate Renee Bowman who adopted three foster kids, killed two of them, and put them in the freezer. The 3rd girl escaped from the house of death and was rescued. This is from 2008 but she was sentenced to life in jail without parole in 2010.

    I nominate John McCain for making Sarah Palin popular.

    I nominate the owner of TLC for allowing douches like the Gosselins, the Browns, and the Palins to have their own shows.

    I missed the Tiki Barber thing too. He also gets my vote.

    Brian Mitchell for acting like a complete lunatic during the Elizabeth Smart trial. Singing Christmas carols, throwing himself on the floor, screaming, and whatever else.

    Carmela Dela Rosa for throwing her granddaughter off of a bridge.

  26. Kim
    December 2, 2010 at 3:29 pm

    I would also vote for Kanye. And Dina Lohan. So many to choose from.

  27. December 2, 2010 at 4:16 pm

    Ok, I think I voted but I’m totally changing it. Senator John McCain needs voted in!

  28. Laura
    December 4, 2010 at 11:41 pm

    That woman and her douchebag husband who taunted a dying 7 year old girl, just for the sake of being douches. Jennifer Petkov is her name. The ladies at Rants from Mommyland had a few posts about her.

  29. Jay
    July 10, 2011 at 9:56 pm

    Larry Summers

Comments are closed.