It’s getting hot outside. So take off…some of your clothes.


Summer is approaching and here in the Mid-Atlantic that means temperatures in excess of 85 degrees and the kind of humidity that probably resulted in the extinction of Mid-Atlantic dinosaurs who drowned trying to breath the soupy air. So, all over the region, women are updating their wardrobes to reflect the change in season.  Men…aren’t.

I really like men for the most part but I have some significant complaints about them. I mean, this is a gender who will pay extra for chicken wings if they’re served by a girl in a tight t-shirt – not a girl they can touch, not a girl who even likes them, just a girl in a tight t-shirt. And yet, this gender is largely in charge.  In fact, they wage wars for the privilege of being in charge when it appears that all they want to be in charge to do is to gain access to girls (or boys) in tight t-shirts.

Um, yeah.

Anyway, clothes are another thing that men are screwing up on a pretty major level, at least in the working world. Let’s say it’s a hot, humid summer day and my husband and I both need to dress for meetings.  I will wear lightweight slacks, a light top, a cardigan, and sandals. And appropriate undergarments.  My husband will wear boxers, a t-shirt, socks, pants, a belt, a dress shirt, a jacket, a tie, and leather dress shoes. Which is exactly the same thing he’d wear for meetings in the dead of winter. He and other men in office jobs make no allowances for climate when they get dressed.  Whereas I could walk down the street in my work outfit and maybe take off the cardigan to ease the heat a bit and be pretty comfortable, a guy, even if he stripped off his jacket and tie, is still wearing two solid layers of clothing. He would be dead of heat stroke within about three blocks.

Seriously, why are men in charge?

The sad consequence of men not bothering to read a weather report before dressing in their stifling uniform 365 days a year is that most offices are refrigerated to approximately 75 degrees below zero all summer.  So, all of us women, who are dressed to be comfortable outside, are forced to step indoors and swathe ourselves in shawls and blankets so that we don’t turn into popsicles at our desks. I’ve worked some places where the a/c was so cold that I needed to walk outside several times a day just to restore the sensation to my hands and feet.

I’m convinced that a major cause of global warming is men in suits needing indoor climate control to prevent head-related illness resulting from their dumbass attire.

This complaint of mine is not new and is always met with the same response: Yes, but do you really want men wearing sandals and showing off their gnarly feet all summer?  No, I do not, but most men I know have two working arms and could give themselves pedicures just like we women do in order to look neat and tidy during sandal season.  It’s called parity between the sexes and should have been written into that fair-pay act that was passed recently; equal pay for equal work and equal grooming to look appropriate in the workplace regardless of the weather.

At the very least, men could agree to dispense with suits from Memorial Day to Labor Day. Let them wear khakis and golf shirts all summer.  They’d be a lot less cranky if they were wearing fewer layers.  And the environmental impact would be phenomenal: offices could raise the temperature to something mammals are meant to live in, there’d be fewer dry cleaning chemicals released into the water supply from all those suits not needing to be cleaned (sorry dry cleaners! I promise to bring you my down comforter every summer to make up for the loss of suit-related revenue), and men might be less likely to start wars or run for Congress if they were more physically comfortable.

And we’d all be happier if that happened.

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13 comments for “It’s getting hot outside. So take off…some of your clothes.

  1. May 19, 2010 at 7:50 am

    “Seriously, why are men in charge?” HAHA! Loved this. Our office is kept so cold during the summer months that I run my space heater to stay comfortable. This is not good for our electric bills, boss man.

  2. May 19, 2010 at 9:00 am

    Have you noticed that pantyhose have been all but wiped off the face of the planet?

    “That’s right. The women are smarter. The women are smarter, that’s right.” — Harry Belafonte as he was busy sweating his tookus off in a Jamaican music studio while his wife sipped cocktails poolside.

  3. KLZ
    May 19, 2010 at 9:33 am

    They would definitely be happier in khakis and golf shirts.

    I mean, I just went to a wedding where we needed to hand the groom a handkerchief BECAUSE HE WAS SWEATING in the air conditioned church. My husband sweats while he eats. My 8 month old son sweats while he sleeps.

    They’re just hot, irritable people. Let’s let them wear less clothes.

  4. May 19, 2010 at 10:22 am

    OMG I agree. My office is a freaking refrigerator! I actually have an oscillating heater and it’s on! Even though it’s almost 90 degrees outside. I just don’t get it.

  5. May 19, 2010 at 11:24 am

    THUMBS. UP. I currently work in an office where I have to go outside to warm my hands enough to come back in and type. It’s stupid.

  6. May 19, 2010 at 11:53 am

    The air conditioner is on right now, and my little space heater is running under my desk. Drives me crazzzzzyyyyy.

  7. May 19, 2010 at 12:27 pm

    Haha, I’ve been lucky enough to never have had a 9-5 type office job. My husband however works in one and it’s also freezing year round.

    His problem though isn’t men in suits. They have a semi-casual environment so no suits or ties. There however a lot of um, older women. Apparently they have their own summer year round…

  8. May 19, 2010 at 12:53 pm

    I can’t comment because my office is run by a woman and it is still FREAKING COLD in here. And in the summer (year round actually) it is so casual in here that most of the (2 of the 3) guys wear shorts and sandals.

    Seriously…one of the sales people comes back from the gym in running shorts, a t-shirt, and sweat.

  9. Monkey's Mom
    May 19, 2010 at 4:40 pm

    And this post is why you are one of my favorite blogs 🙂

  10. CAGirl
    May 20, 2010 at 8:39 pm

    My office has summer casual (starting Monday hooray!) so the men get to wear khakis and golf shirts & I can break out the skirts. Sadly, I’ll still be sitting under a blanket half the summer. Now if they would only get rid of the requirement for nylons for business dress during the winter…

  11. CAGirl
    May 20, 2010 at 8:39 pm

    My office has summer casual (starting Monday hooray!) so the men get to wear khakis and golf shirts & I can break out the skirts. Sadly, I’ll still be sitting under a blanket half the summer.

  12. liz
    May 21, 2010 at 11:29 am

    Very, very true! And my husband still complains about what he’s going to wear. Um, a suit, just like you do no matter the season?! How can he have a fashion concern when it’s so obvious what his choice needs to be?

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